As I’m coming up to my final weeks of pregnancy, I find myself thinking more and more about the kind of mom I want to be.

I would like to point out that I’m the type of person who can think that far ahead. I have been only able to wrap my head around about being pregnant and giving birth these past few months.

As I let my mind wander into the abyss of all things motherhood, I’ve been thinking about a few habits I’ve wanted to stop doing. These are all habits I wanted to stop even before I found out I was pregnant and feel like her impending arrival is a huge motivation.

These are habits the woman I want to be doesn’t practice. I’m very careful to not get tripped up in the idea that I’m not good enough, but these are small changes I could make to get me closer to the person my heart wants to become.

Let’s get started:

current mood board

*All images are sourced from Pinterest

Judging

I know this is a big habit and not something you can change in a few days, weeks, or even years but catching myself when my mind wants to judge others is eye-opening. Most of the time I’m not even aware that I’m judging. It’s a natural reaction. As I become more aware, I can slowly turn it around.

Our children learn by watching our actions not just listening to what we say. If I’m secretly judging everyone, my daughter will pick up on that and that’s definitely one thing I don’t want her to learn from me.

Ignoring My Needs/Intuition/Desires

This habit is a product of my people-pleasing tendencies. I’m someone who hates confrontation and if I can make someone else happy by doing what they want, I will do it.

This is a terrible way to live. I’m constantly telling the universe I’m not worthy and other people’s needs are more important than my own. This is not how I want my daughter to see me.

We are all worthy. I’ve been doing a lot of work around this limiting belief and have realized it’s really small steps like standing up for what’s important to me, even if its a restaurant I want to go to, saying no to an event I don’t want to attend or just voicing my opinion when I  know it’s not what others want to hear.

Saying Sorry/Apologizing

I’m not talking about being rude or not owning up to when I’ve made a mistake, but I say sorry far too much. It has become almost like an automatic response to most situations and I am actively trying to stop it.

It is attached to this idea that I’m not valuing my worth. I see myself as always in the wrong in most situations and saying sorry to strangers even when I didn’t do anything. It’s become more of a knee-jerk type of thing. I know how important our words are so I am keeping a close eye on this one.

Thinking About Everything I Eat

I hate how much I think about food. I don’t just think about how delicious it is or where I’m gonna eat tonight. I think about the effects what I’m eating has on my body. Transforming my relationship with food isn’t an easy task. As I’m becoming a mother to a little girl, I know how she sees food is gonna depend heavily on me. (Holy Shit!)

So I want food to be enjoyable and I think this starts with a few simple steps.

A) making food at home.

B) sitting down to enjoy food

C) being grateful for the food we have and how it fuels us.

Sounds silly but these simple rules have helped me already in so many ways and I want more than ever to keep them up for me and my little girl.

Shrinking

You wouldn’t guess this about me right off the bat but large crowds and aggressive personalities scare me. I have a fear of being the center of attention and tend to shrink around others so I won’t be called out.

I also feel like I have to hide who I am in order to make others feel comfortable around me. If I’m too stylish, pretty, smart, funny, wealthy( the list goes on and on) then other people will hate me.

This stems back to some childhood trauma but I know I can start today by allowing myself to be seen in places and situations that feel right. Slowly but surely, I will get there.  

Not Accepting Compliments

This habit is definitely something I think a lot of women can understand. We all do it. The whole “oh this old thing? I got it for sale at Target” instead of just saying thank you when someone compliments our outfit.

For me, this action is a direct reflection of my fear of being seen as too much, hence why I shrink. I don't want people thinking I am too obsessed with things or clothes or money etc. so I can’t take a compliment because then I would be seen as stuck up. Silly, I know. I’m working on this one a lot. It’s a deeper issue, but knowing the issue is there is the first step.

Well, that’s my list. I’m not perfect and breaking most of these habits will take time but I truly believe that being aware is a HUGE first step. I would love to hear from you what you think?

Does anyone else have changes they want to make that seem more doable because of a life-changing event about to take place? It’s these moments in life that really place us in a unique position to see everything with new eyes. It gives us a chance that we should all jump at.

Wish me luck!

jodi xx